Quieting Practice

Quieting is best done in a Bonded Pair because of the intimacy and relational bonds that are strengthened by the exercise.  However, a peaceful state of being can be generated with the Lord, “in the presence of the Lord”, by going through the same exercise minus the bodily presence of another person. 

Quieting in LESS stressful times will generate new neural pathways (actually grow a part of the brain) so that you can then generate peace in MORE stressful encounters or times. 

Carve out at least 10 Minutes/at Least once a Day – Quieting for 10 minutes may be extended if needed and it’s typical to struggle to quiet in the early phases of learning this skill.  If you have the opportunity and the ability to extend the time necessary to gain a peaceful state of body and mind it’s good to practice doing so.  Deep centering and a peaceful calm state, will sometimes lead to sleep and may be necessary to reset one’s Relational Circuits or RC’s.  This is especially true in cases of intense stress or when dealing with various forms of trauma.  

Sit and or lounge/recline in a comfortable position. The exercise assumes “cuddling” and “closeness” as the physical foundation for connection but the exercise is much more than the typical understand of cuddling.  

  • You will want to remove distractions like TV and other media sources.  
  • Get comfortable together-Cuddle postures/positions 
  • Quiet- this means that you want to wrap up any conversation and just be quiet in one another’s comforting embrace.  This will not be easy when triggered but is often what we need the most.
  • Begin to Slow your breathing.  Deep breathing from the diaphragm is suggested.  Allow your hear rates to slow down and synchronize.  
  • Focus your mind on positive images, senses, memories, instances and emotions of thankfulness. In the beginning it may be challenging to focus on things that build Joy but in time you will get faster at removing negative thoughts and distractions and grow in your capacity to relish in joyful “good” thoughts.  Remember, the Joy of the Lord is your strength (Psalm 28:7) and in Quietness and Trust is our Salvation  (Isaiah 30:17).  

Immanuel Journaling Exercise

STEP ONE — Gratitude. Write anything I appreciate and then write God’s response to my gratitude. Dear God, I'm thankful for .... Dear child of mine ....

STEP TWO —I can see you. Write from God’s perspective what He observes in you right now, including your physical sensations. I can see you at your desk. Your breathing is shallow and your shoulders are tight...

STEP THREE — I can hear you. Write from God’s perspective what He hears you saying to yourself. You are wondering if I will speak to you and how you would ever know. You are discouraged and tired... OR: You woke up full of energy this morning. You are ready to take on the world. Your mind is buzzing...

STEP FOUR — I understand how big this is for you. How does God see your dreams, blessings or upsets and troubles? I want you to know that I care about what matters to you. Your desire to honor me brings me great pleasure... OR: I understand how intimidated you feel. This situation feels all-consuming to you as if you are about to sink...

STEP FIVE — I am glad to be with you and treat your weakness tenderly. How does God express His desire to participate with your life? Your dreams are precious to me. I  ll you with life each day and really enjoy your desire to .... OR: I see your discouragement after yelling again. Times when you are frustrated and tired are when I want to be closer to you ....

STEP SIX — I can do something about what you are going through. What does God give you for this time? Come away with me. I offer you times of refreshing, new energy and vision .... OR: I will strengthen you. Remember how your friend encouraged you last week? With me you are not alone ....

STEP SEVEN — Read what you have written aloud (preferably to someone.)