First Wednesday | June 7, 2023

comms   -   June 7, 2023

Spiritual Freedom : Shame

 

18 “The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me,
Because He has anointed Me
To preach the gospel to the poor;
He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted,
To proclaim liberty to the captives
And recovery of sight to the blind,
To set at liberty those who are oppressed;
Luke 4:18 NKJV
8 He who sins is of the devil, for the devil has sinned from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that He might destroy the works of the devil.
1 John 3:8 NKJV

 

Shame is the Prison Warden of Intimacy

Shame – a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of my weakness

 

We were not created with shame  

25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed. – Genesis 2:25 NKJV 

 

First signs of shame in the Bible

7 Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves coverings.   – Genesis 3:7 NKJV

 

Shame cause us to hide from relationships

8 And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. – Genesis 3:8 NKJV

 

Shame is the Prison Warden of Intimacy

  • Intimate relationships are based on
    • Mutual acceptance – I accept you for who you are not who I can make you
    • Mutual trust – your weakness, fears, and all shortcomings are safe with me
    • Mutual care – have your best interest in everything I do.
    • Knowing one another – we can be truly naked with one another
    • Commitment to one another above self preservation

 

Look at how shame works

3 For you shall expand to the right and to the left, And your descendants will inherit the nations, And make the desolate cities inhabited. 4 “Do not fear, for you will not be ashamed; Neither be disgraced, for you will not be put to shame; For you will forget the shame of your youth, And will not remember the reproach of your widowhood anymore. – Isaiah 54:3-4 NKJV

 

Shame Keeps:

  • Us from becoming who God created us to be
  • Us from reclaiming the lost territory and promises of your family line
  • Your children under the same curses of your ancestors
  • Allows fear to hold us back
  • Remove grace (equiping and provision from God) from our lives

Thoughts and feelings of shame

  • You may hear the whispers of
    • I’m to dirty to be accepted
    • If they only knew they would not want me
    • No one can love me
    • They don’t want top be around me
    • They don’t want to hear what I have to say
    • No one sees me
    • I’m not as good as they are
    • I’m all alone
    • If I try and fail I can’t handle the feeling so I just want try
    • I’m just not good enough

 

  • Shame based thinking
    • Makes us vulnerable to perfectionism
    • We are critical of ourselves which drives us to criticize others
    • We use self- defeating thoughts to shield ourselves from disappointment

 

Shame effects each of us differently

  • Fights
    • I power up
    • Stand my ground
    • Bully
    • Reject others and their thoughts
    • Refuse help
    • Use shame on others
    • Blame others
    • Arrogant
  • Flight
    • I shut down
    • I hide my true self
    • I run away (always have plans of escape)
    • Perfectionism (the shame last time was so painful it has to be right)
    • Avoid conflict
    • Escape from reality (work,hobbies, drugs, Alcohol)
    • Regret not saying or doing anything about our situation
    • Feelings of no one cares enough to know me
  • Freeze
    • You can’t think straight
    • Hide true emotions
    • Mentally check out
    • Detach from the world through sleep or hiding somewhere alone
    • Avoid close relationships
      • With coworkers
      • With family
      • With friends
  • Appease
    • Ignore your emotional needs to take care of the other person
    • Make yourself as useful and as helpful as possible
    • Neglect to develop your own self identity
    • You offer praise and admiration even when they are criticizing you
    • You agree to things that you would rather not
    • You know ver little about what you like or enjoy
    • Avoid sharing your own thoughts for fear of repercussions
    • Have few boundaries around your own needs
    • Self deprecate
    • People pleaser

 

Shame is the Prison Warden of Intimacy

2 looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. – Hebrews 12:2 NKJV

 

What sin broke, Jesus wants to heal

18 “The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me, Because He has anointed Me To preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, To proclaim liberty to the captives And recovery of sight to the blind, To set at liberty those who are oppressed; – Luke 4:18 NKJV